Today, I feel in control.
Don’t you have those days where you wake up, and you feel that everything is in the right place — that each thing is where it should be. And even if you know that it’s not, you have that feeling in your gut that you can and WILL get to where you want to be in the near future. That’s how I feel today. It must be, because of the spontaneous Mom’s Day out activity that I attended sponsored by Sun Life Financial Philippines yesterday (I’m all eager, willing and able to go for my dreams), or, it actually may be something else. I really can’t give you a proper reason, so that you, moms may replicate what I did to get to this state.
But what I’ve learned yesterday from the guest psychologist, Michele Alignay, is that this feeling of being in control, may not last, and it’s okay. As they say, in life, the one thing in life that’s constant is change. And what better way to show these changes in a mom’s life and our changing relationship with our children, but through this video or #SunShorts shared by Sun Life Financial Philippines (She Said, She Said). This video really struck a cord. I may look like I’m super in control of things, and it may look like that I never get mad, but there are times where I really shout and lose my cool at my daughter and at people I love. There are times that I break down, I cry (for no reason) and I get frustrated and depressed. I totally was able to relate with the mom in the video! Super naiyak ako!
We will have it easy if we accept, prepare and plan for changes that may or may not happen. As a mom, I think it’s harder for us since we have a lot of things on our minds. In this economy where the standard is to have double income households, most of the moms I know, balance working/earning a decent living, taking care of the children and taking care of themselves. And truly, it’s a struggle to find that perfect “balance”. This is why I like the definition of balance that was presented yesterday.
If we are looking for that balance, where balance comes from the idea that everything should be at equal states or everything should be given equal time, you’re on the wrong track. Balancing is about 1) knowing ourselves, 2) process of continually centering energy with the cooperation and conscious support of all other parts.
Yesterday’s talk was really inspiring, and it reminded me that I should constantly ask these three questions:
- What do I want?
- What do I think I “Ought to do”?
- What I think I can do?
At any given point in our lives, we will have something that we want more than our other wants. We will have something that we “ought to do” and we will know what we can do. After hearing this during the Mom’s Day Out of Sun Life Financial Philippines, being a mindful mom now comes into play when every day, I accept that I can only do so much in 24 hours. I have learned howt o prioritize. I have learned to say “no”, and moving forward, I will focus on things that are truly essential.
It’s nice to think that we can be like Wonder Woman, or even just be like Gal Gadot (haha!) every time — so in control with her “I’ve got this!” attitude. But we only human and I’m sure even Gal Gadot goes through times where she feels vulnerable. But what we need to be mindful of is that we have a choice on how we can emotionally react to these things. Will we intentionally remain in that state of peace and satisfaction or will we succumb to the judgement of others or worse, fall into the trap of judging ourselves and feeling guilty about not living up to our own expectations of ourselves?
So today, after a rejuvenating massage given by I’m Hotel Spa, after the amazing loot bag that I’ve received, after that delicious buffet from Bloom at I’m Hotel, after the great and inspirational talks from Michele and Mylene Segismundo from Sun Life Financial Philippines Cluster Head Manila, I have decided to feel peace and satisfaction. I wrote down all of the Practical ways for Self-Care that was shared:
- Affirm your goodness
- Release Control (of things beyond you)
- Saying NO is okay (and needed at times)
- Feeling happy and satisfied is normal
- Relinquish some task that stresses you
- During emotional highs: PAUSE
- Ditch the guilt
- Choose to love more
- Be silly with the kids
- Flirt with your spouse! Make your marriage matter.
- Choose to rest or sleep
- Give yourself an extra 10 minutes in the shower
- Put a little color in your face
- Find a spot for daily reflection
- Find a daily physical activity that you can do
All of these tips of Michele were great and I intend to do it! So guess what, the first thing that I did today, was I met with my Sun Life Financial Advisor. There is something about having your finances in place that satisfies you (well, that’s how I personally feel at least! haha). I learned about their educational fund product. I actually have savings already for Zeeka’s College stored in Mutual Funds, but I thought of a back up.
I’m getting another policy from Sun Life Financial Philippines (which I will write about in another blog post), and I’m excited! haha! I know that’s a weird thing to say about getting a policy, but that’s exactly how I feel. I feel wonder woman-ish today!
So if you are looking to feel the way that I do today, join the next Mom’s Day Out events on July 1 and 15.
Cheers to a peaceful and content life, mindful moms! Let’s all say I’ll be the Master of Myself!